Tuesday, June 07, 2011

JUNE JOURNEY: Should I Expect Less?

This month I plan to jump back into blogging (after taking time off to move) to write about an issue with which I struggle. Expectations. It all boils down to this—I tend to expect people to act, react, and think like I do (or BETTER). 

Pastor said something in his sermon Sunday just HOURS after I had the same realization in my own heart-to-heart self-talk: To expect anything of others is to not have unconditional love, and it is a form of judging. OUCH. Yes, the Bible and God have expectations for Christ-followers, but that's not my job. 

I can lead by example, teach principles, mentor and come alongside of those who are still on the journey (and I hope others come alongside of me, because I need work too!). I can even step out on a limb and say "thus saith the Lord" (well, in real-life speak it would be more like "God says...") But when I expect something outside of my control, I set myself up for all sorts of frustrating emotions, and it doesn't really help the one on whom I'm projecting my expectations.

Expectations tend to let me down, disappoint me, cause me to act out of wrong motives, and push all the wrong buttons. I know that. How do I fix this problem? I'm going to spend this month working on it, and will post my observations here.

If you struggle with this too, would you like to go on this June Journey with me? Feel free to post your comments as we go along, or if you want to remain anonymous to the blog, write me directly at: kathy@kathycarltonwillis and I can post your thoughts anonymously. That way we can all support each other.

3 comments:

Holly said...

Oh, Kathy -- thanks for your thoughtful observations. I think you touched on the thing I've been thinking about: the difference between expectation and hope. I'm learning to hope more, and expect less, and spending time thinking about the difference between those two things. I'm looking forward to your June journey!

Robin J. Steinweg said...

I expect this will be a growing month with this topic! Thanks for addressing it, Kathy!

Karen Jordan said...

Great topic! I love your example: "To expect anything of others is to not have unconditional love, and it is a form of judging. OUCH."