Life List

Throughout my life, I've heard of people who have the "Bucket List." Things they want to do before they kick the bucket. I think I'd rather call it a Life List. Anything on that list would have to ADD to your life, or it wouldn't be worth putting on a list! I've never made such a list, have you?

If I were to start such a list, what might I add to my already BLESSED LIFE?

I might add things such as:

1. Go snorkeling.
2. In my dreams I para-sail, but not sure I would be brave enough in real life.
3. Publish a book with my byline.
4. Make a souffle.
5. Try truffle-laced ANYTHING.
6. Visit Japan.
7. Mission trip to Mexico.
8. Go on a cruise.
9. Find the perfect hairstyle (that might TAKE a lifetime!).
10.Sing the national anthem at events in 5 different towns. (one down, four to go)

More important is my spiritual "Life List." It contains only 2 items:

1. To grow in my relationship with Christ, and to know Him in His fullness; pleasing Him in my thoughts and deeds.

2. To reflect Christ to others, discipling them and being discipled by them in an interactive fellowship, always mindful of inviting others to join the journey with me.

Sanctuary from Floor View

New Education Building (With Fellowship Hall)

South Padre Island-Gulf Side

Inside of Sanctuary, from Balcony View

Front of Church

Side of Church/Damaged Windows Being Replaced

Photo of Back of Parsonage

Photo of Front of Parsonage

Photo of the Side of the Parsonage

WHIM-Women's Hearts In Ministry

Come on a WHIM-Women's Hearts In Ministry, that is. If you are a woman and serve in ministry, you are welcome to join a new e-mail group I started. This group is designed for: pastors' wives, missionaries, staff wives, staff women, women's ministry directors, etc. We ask that you subscribe to a Christian statement of faith and that you can testify of a specific time in your life that your walk with Christ began. WHIM will be there for you-when you rejoice, we will rejoice. When you cry, we will cry. Our empathy will relate to your day. Come on a WHIM to share ideas, recipes, book reviews, Bible studies, and prayer requests. Brainstorm events and themes. We can thrive in the position of helper, whether as a helper to a ministry or to a minister. We are WHIM, Women's Hearts In Ministry.

If you'd like to check us out, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Womens_Hearts_In_Ministry/

Or, e-mail to subscribe at:
Womens_Hearts_In_Ministry-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

What a Journey!

Greetings-Friends & Family!

Many of you have wondered about our well-being over the past few days, so I wanted to touch base and let you know our status.

Tuesday we left around noon and headed for Jackson, MS. I enjoyed a catfish po'boy for lunch, with a side of fried pickle chips. YUM!

Wednesday we drove to Vidor, TX to spend some time with a family we discipled, Leno and Mary Yellott. Mary is Hispanic and was born in the USA; Leno is Mexican and was adopted by a USA couple when he was 18 (they helped him get his start in the states). Leno has built a roofing company from scratch-bringing over family members as he can, for staff. Many live on the same lot or block as he. Considering he was mute until the age of 10, he is quite the success story. He doesn't read English or Spanish, but he knows numbers! Leno was one of Russ's deacons when he pastored in Vidor, and Mary was one of my best friends. Russ performed his first Spanish baptism (he memorized the words) for a family member named Oscar-and we got to see him this trip-grinning ear to ear. Oscar asked where we lived now. We said Kentucky, and he said "Pollo!" And then we had Mary tell him, no Kentucky Fried Pollo in Fulton, Kentucky!

We also saw Mati and his familia, and Rene. And we enjoyed time with the Yellott's grown children, Connie and Alan. It was a blessing to this ol' heart to see so many who were discipled during our time in Vidor, still going strong. And to see Alan all grown up with his wife Belinda, and to think we knew him starting at age 12!

When we got ready for bed, the weather said tropical storm Humberto was headed for Galveston. We wondered if we would make it to our next destination and determined to just take it an hour at a time. But first, SLEEP! In the middle of the night, when the air conditioning shut off and the lights were blackened, I realized the storm I heard outside was more serious than a thunderstorm. Leno awakened us around 6 am to say he needed our keys to move the van in case his palm tree fell. Russ got up with him, and I snuggled in the bed a while longer, although the crowing roosters kept me from sleeping (and Jazzy was antsy, unsure of the upset, but knowing there was one). We all gathered outside on their front porch/carport area, and talked. Mati's wife Chelly swept the fallen leaves. Her children, Angel (4-year-old all boy) and Karen (10-year-old shy girl) entertained us. Angel had his Uncle Leno strum on the guitar so he could sing (in Spanish) and always ended with AIEEEE in a high pitched Cajun-style yodel! His legs and hands not to be outdone by his voice, danced and strummed while seated in a rocking lawn chair.

No shower, no power, no land lines, but the cell phone kept ringing. We were in the home of a roofer! Russ and Leno took a smaller truck to go see what was out there, and discovered the street in front of the school covered in 3 feet of water. Smaller vehicles were getting almost swallowed. Traffic was backed up, so they returned home to get a truck with more gas. This time Mary and I were invited to go along for the adventure, and we made it through the water, to see about some donuts. All the shop had left were kolaches, so we ate them in gratitude (they were yummy!). Each gas station was packed with panicked Vidorians, flashbacking to Hurricane Rita, getting gasoline for their generators, prepared for the long haul. We witnessed cameramen and newscasters reporting the damage done. In a nearby town, a man was killed under his carport. Sometime around this time we discovered Humberto had been upgraded to a hurricane rather than a tropical storm, and that Vidor was in the eye of the storm-not Galveston.

I can say I've survived a hurricane! Grant it, Humberto was only graded a Category 1, unlike the Category 5 (Rita) that hit them a few years ago.

Speaking of Rita, we were glad to see that Vidor had rebuilt since that disastrous hurricane and was looking better than ever. Most churches were able to use the insurance money to improve their structures. We were saddened to see that what used to be the church where Russ pastored was not able to rebuild after Rita, and they had chopped off the damaged part of the sanctuary and capped the end of the building. Rita may have destroyed the church, but those who became believers as a result of that ministry were still going strong as they dispersed to various churches for worship.

One of the funny things that happened while we were staying with the Yellotts is that I put on a little show without even realizing it. Leno told me he was growing some hot peppers hotter than jalapenos. I looked at the plant, and the peppers looked similar to the tabasco-sized peppers my Granny and Papa used to grow. They used to pickle them and we ate them with pinto beans. Mati brought out a large jar of these peppers, and I ate the tip off of one (cautious at first, until I knew how hot they were). Then Russ ate a teeny-tiny bit of it and said "that's HOT!" and then I finished the pepper. For "braving the pepper" they gave me the jar to take home. The next day, Leno wanted me to eat a raw pepper from the plant, so I did. Evidently it was then that someone said in Spanish that they had never seen a white woman eat a hot pepper without running for some water. Ha ha! They then gave me yet ANOTHER jar of the peppers. I explained privately to Mary that there was no way I could eat both jars of peppers before they went bad, but that I didn't want to hurt the feelings of Mati and Chelly. She said I should just take them and give them away (Mom-they are yours if you want them!). Then she explained that Chelly had just been in the E.R. for stomach pain that ended up being an ulcer (and stones), and the doctor told her she couldn't eat spicy things. So they were giving me their peppers-and thought it was funny that I could eat something that one of "their own" couldn't eat. CUTE!

The waters from Humberto receded and we were able to leave Vidor in the afternoon, on the way to Galveston. First we stopped in Texas City at our hotel, to grab a shower and freshen up. Then we entered the island of Galveston and found our friends, Dennis and Teresa Hankins, and daughter Becky. We enjoyed fellowship, talked about church stuff and hobbies like writing and music, and ate a yummy gourmet-style meal at Casey's. It was great to see them after six years.

After a night's stay in Texas City, we journeyed on to Raymondville-our destination! Oh how it thrilled our souls to see the mission-style church with gothic touches. I'll take photos to share as I can. Since no one was there, we went to the local McDonalds to see about wi-fi and then called Terry, the head of the pastor search committee and deacon board. Terry is a teacher at the high school and also the tennis coach. Terry escorted us to the parsonage, and Guy, another gentleman on the search committee, met us there. They helped us unload (it looked like we were moving in!) and told us where to find things before giving us time alone to unwind after the trip. We decided to venture out for dinner and tried the Carne Guisada at Mecca. It was "media" but the server was sweet. Then we went to their H*E*B grocery store. I used to love the H*E*B in Beaumont, so I'm happy happy! Everywhere we turned we found more of the Mexican treats (both savory and sweet) that we used to love so much. And we looked around to notice the faces, and felt as if we were in Old Mexico. The homes and landscaping also bespeak the same "feel."

Saturday we met with the pastor search committee for dinner, and enjoyed a time of fellowship as well as an opportunity for them to interview us. It was easy to bond with these good people!

Then Sunday-the day of our expectation! We got all spiffed and buffed and showed up for Sunday School. I attended a women's class and enjoyed the sweet spirit. These women really enjoy getting into the Word-many carried study Bibles or 4-version parallel Bibles. It was neat to see they didn't just rely on their quarterly (S.S. curriculum), but each had their Bibles open to the passage we studied.

The new song leader, Jesse has such an endearing spirit! He's a band director at a nearby school and father of a one-month old baby. He is jolly, tenderhearted, willing, moldable, and all the traits for a good servant of the Lord.

Russ preached both Sunday morning and Sunday night, and it seemed he connected with the congregation. It was great to sense their reactions and hear their interactions and responses. Sunday afternoon before church we met with the church body in an informal time of tea and cookies. It was a great time to hear their life stories and share our hearts with them. After church Sunday night, the pianist told the chairman of the pastor search committee that Russ was a "keeper." She then turned to hug my neck and told me the same thing. I jokingly replied, "well then don't throw him back!" (like the fish.) She said Russ was just the man of God meant for this time in this place. What a wonderful affirmation of what we had already sensed. Of course, there are no guarantees. Another pastor candidate will be following us, and then they will consider who to recommend for a vote-or will pursue more options. We're not really sure. We just are willing to be used, whether for this two-week period, or permanently.

Let me tell you a little about the parsonage. It was built around 1960 from what I understand, and is a type of ranch or rambler style home. The kitchen still has the original cook-top and oven! It is connected to a sort of great room, with areas for dining and recreation or television, with a type of very large 3-foot squares of what looks like a hard-finished flooring (not tile, but not linoleum). The rest of the home is floored with berber carpet. All the walls and woodwork are the same white paint. One full restroom has the 1960s pink tile floor, countertop and wall surround. The master restroom has the same look, only in mint green. There are 3 bedrooms, and also a formal living space that is currently blocked off to save on air conditioning. The most noticeable thing about the house is the number of closets. The master bedroom has 3 large closets, the guest room has 2 large closets, the other bedroom (probably will be the office if we come) has 1 large closet. The hallway has 2 more closets, and the kitchen has 2 pantry closets. Each restroom has built-in storage. The family room has large built-in bookcases and cabinets. It also has a sliding glass door to go out to the porch/carport area. There is also a laundry coming in from the carport, on the way to the kitchen. Oh! And I mustn't forget the 2 doors outside under the carport, closets for even MORE storage! The formal living room has a foyer with yet another closet, and also built-in shelving.

Outdoors, there is plenty of local flora and fauna! I can't even identify all of the plants and trees, but I'm sure if I take photos, I can find out! I did recognize 3 orange trees in the fenced side-yard, with green oranges just waiting to ripen. I hope I get to try one! And Russ has been saying for months that his dream would be to sit under a palm tree on Christmas Day. If we come here, that will be possible-as there are several palm trees near the parsonage!

We also have enjoyed the bright-yellow-breasted birds landing in the parsonage's trees. I'm not sure if these are orioles or what-I will have to look at photos to decide what is the best match.

Monday we spent time with the church secretary, and at lunch with her, her daughter, and a friend. What great fun as we cut up and it felt like we had known each other for years rather than days. She said one of the members of the church has been asking if we could just go ahead and vote on "Brother Russ" as pastor because he's the ONE! She asked if we had any thoughts yet about if we wanted to come if called. We said so far everything we have seen matches our heart's desire for ministry, but that each day we seek God's will and also touch base with each other.

Learning the Spanish language will not be necessary down here, but it will be a help. Even so we know what to order on the menu!

Stay posted for more adventures On The Road!

Top 10 Ways You Know You're Not in KY Any More!

10. You find po'boys on the menus instead of sub sandwiches.
9. Spanish Moss decorates the trees.
8. Oil Pumpers in the fields instead of corn.
7. Find crawfish traps and rice fields instead of limb lines and soybean fields.
6. Seagulls and cranes grace the boggy fields-and even ride bareback on cattle.
5. Love bugs pollute the air and collide with windshields rather than lightning bugs.
4. Cajun food signs rather than KFC.
3. Words use more vowels and less consonants (such as Ribodeaux).
2. Instead of rivers, creeks, lakes, and ponds you are more likely to see bayous, marshes, and swamps!
1. Carnage consists of puffed up armadillo rather than fatally injured deer.

And here's a bonus one:

You don't worry about drought, you survive the eye of Hurricane Humberto! We woke up in Vidor, TX with no power, no telephone land lines, and no air conditioning. Streets were flash flooded and lines were out to the main roads at gas stations (to power generators).We're fine now-all snug in a bug at La Quinta Inn, Texas City, TX near Galveston.

A New Meal Planning Technique!

My hubby is always wanting variety in our meals. And wants them to be healthy, yet affordable, without getting stuck with many leftovers. I will plan menus, give him several choices, but sometimes things just don't sound good to him. But when I ask him what he wants, he says the best gift I can give him is him not having to make a meal choice. So, round and round we go. The good news is that he's willing to try new things.

I'm saying all of this because I'm guessing most of you meal-planners out there have the same problems when you are coming up with your menus.

Today, I decided to make a game out of it. Rather than asking Russ what he wanted this week, I told him we were going to play a game, and he was to tell me the first thing that popped into his head. Maybe some of these questions will get you going on your own meal-planning game time.

Here are the questions I used today, and I'll come up with more as time goes on. It was fun!

- Name a food starting with "s."
- Name the meal you would request on death row as your last meal.
- Name a food you would most likely grab at a potluck dinner.
- Name a meal made from hamburger.
- Name a white food.
- Fill in the blank, "I'm hungry for ____"
- _________ counts as a veggie!
- "You can't make me eat green foods, except for ______"
- I wish you would try to make _____ like I order at ____ restaurant.
- I wish you would make ____ like I see on the TV food network or in a magazine.
- I always requested ____ for my birthday dinner.
- I wish you would buy _____ fruit sometime.

Do you want to know the answers? Here goes:
- Salmon starts with "s."
- Pork Chops and Applesauce for a "last meal."
- Lemon Bars at the potluck meal.
- Make stuffed meatloaf with hamburger (also strogonoff).
- Garlic mashed potatoes are white.
- I'm hungry for pork loin roast.
- Corn as a veggie.
- Salad as a green food (I'm making Spinach/Strawberry/Almond salad)
- Crispy Orange Chicken from Applebee's (found recipe online)
- Make fish like on TV
- Never had a birthday request
- Buy berries for fruit.

Let me know in the comments section if you try this game in your own household!

Trust Can Be Exciting!

I firmly believe that I can trust God to have my ultimate good in mind as He directs us and opens doors for our future. He can also close doors to help us move along when we need a little boot.

It can get exciting when we see signs of God's hand at work. Or even just POTENTIALLY at work!

Let' me explain.

For about a year now Russ has sensed that God has wanted him to pastor again. He has been placing resumes and applications every time he hears of a church. I'm guessing over 150 resumes have gone out.

We are serving as interim music at First Baptist in Clinton, KY and LOVE the people. They will be our friends FOREVER. But no matter how much we love the church, we know that Russ needs to be preaching.

So, September 16, 19, and 23 he will be preaching in view of a call ("trying out," or candidating) at First Baptist Church of Raymondville, TX. We are excited, and can't wait!

By now you are wanting to tell me-"Kathy, we know all this!"

Well...there's more!

Yesterday our landlord came by to inform us that the house we are renting was going to be shown by the Realtor to some interested buyers from out of town. You have to realize that this house has been on the market for a couple of years, and has not sold. Probably everyone in this little town who might be interested, has already looked at the home. So it would take an out-of-towner to really come in and make an offer.

We've lived in the home since May 23rd and it hasn't shown ONE time. Until now. I don't think that is coincidence.

Because now, I get the opportunity to TRUST God for the outcome. There are many what-ifs, but here is the one I'm hoping for:

WHAT-IF #1-Maybe God knows we will get the position in Raymondville, and that we will need out of our lease one month early. Maybe He is helping us by providing a buyer, who, if you figure out the timing of most home loans, will land just about the same time on the calendar as a possible move on our part. See how amazing that is?

Of course, there are other possible outcomes too...

WHAT-IF #2-Maybe we won't get the position in Raymondville, the house will sell, and we will have to decide where in the world we want to move to. We can go anywhere. Russ's last week at Clinton is next week. We have no permanent ties here, although we love the people we have met here. My business is doing well, but would do even better if we lived in a state that was more "tax friendly." Even a move 5 miles away to Tennessee would be advantageous. Or maybe a move to Texas. Who knows?

WHAT-IF #3-Or another outcome could be that we do get the position in Raymondville-but the house doesn't sell here. No biggie. Most rental leases can be broken if your job takes you out of the area and you aren't just moving to another rental in the area. But even if it can't be broken-we are only talking one month, so it's no big deal. Besides-we don't know for sure when Raymondville will be voting-maybe their vote won't take place until later. Who knows?

WHAT-IF #4-Another outcome is that we don't get the position in Raymondville, and the house here doesn't sell. If that happens, we still have a lot to consider. What next? Where next? What timing?

See? No matter what the outcome, it's all a matter of trust. Waiting on God. He's not a puppet master and He's not just pulling our strings to make us move. We can confound things by making unwise choices. That's why we trust-we get our direction from Him. And He in turn blesses obedience. And gives peace. Even when things don't go our way, with peace we can deal with anything.

But still...let's go back to What-if #1. What if? What if God is already working things out so that if everything falls into place we will soon have a new ministry and will also have a way out of our lease here. That would be simply AMAZING!

See why I got excited rather than depressed when I received word that a Realtor was showing the home we are renting to a potential buyer?

I can't wait to see what's next!

Queen Esther's Beauty Treatment?

I haven't really made a list of some of the beauty treatments Esther had that year prior to her selection as queen. But I do know that some women enjoy being fussed over, made to feel special, or at least enjoy the relaxing calm that comes with spa treatments. Spa has the word AH! in it and that's what I find myself saying when I splurge with any sort of spa treatment. It doesn't happen often, maybe once or twice a year. Just often enough to make it special, so I will appreciate it. Indulged without coming to expect it.

For our 26th Wedding Anniversary gift, Russ gave me a half-day of spa and beauty at my salon. For that, I'm getting: a new hair cut, some color (I'm grayer than ever!), a spa pedicure (which I hear is more special than the regular pedicure), and a facial that also includes a neck and back massage. I wonder if I will feel like Queen Esther? Or at least like a calmer, more relaxed Kathy? I've only had one facial in my life and it was AMAZING so I can't wait for this treat!

All of this is my preparation (again to use the Esther analogy) for our upcoming consideration for ministry at Raymondville. More important is the spiritual preparation prior to their vote.

My prayer for this is, "Thy will be done, dear Lord."

Opportunity to Serve!

First Baptist Church in Raymondville, TX has interviewed us, and interviewed our references and decided my husband Russ is their #1 pick. YAY! We are so excited because this ministry opportunity has so many of the elements of what we are looking for in a ministry (small town in the South, multi-cultural, etc.).

So, we will be traveling by car for 3 days to get there, and will candidate in view of a pastoral call, on September 16th, 19th, 23rd. We will spend about 11 days there and travel back 3 days. So that will be a 17 Day Adventure! :o)

Also on the way there we hope to see a couple of our friends (Leno and Mary Yellott in Vidor, TX, and Dennis and Teresa Hankins in Galveston, TX).

The thing is, Hurricane Dean is headed to Raymondville right now. If it does hit, maybe God wants us to be there to help with the clean up. Who knows? Or maybe it won't hit, and God will tell us "just checking to see if you are willing to go ANYWHERE I send you!" (Yep-we are!)

Please pray about the is opportunity with us. You know how Jeremiah said he tried to suppress the Word inside him, and it burned and would not remain silent? That's how we are about ministry-we just HAVE to find a place to serve!

Thanks for praying with us-I'll keep you posted.

My New Web site!

Check out my new Web site at:
http://www.kathycarltonwillis.com

I almost feel like I need to give it a birth announcement!

SomeOne Cares!

Click on graphic to check out this site. Such a worthy cause. Please pass the word along about the LifeWay sponsored conference. Also, check out the movie while you are at this site. Warning: It will bring goosebumps and tears.

Survey From a Friend

A friend sent me the questions-this should be fun!

1. *What time is it? - 3:38 pm
2. *Name: - Kathy Carlton Willis
3. *What are you most afraid of? - Disappointing God and others
4. *What type of car do you own? - 2002 White Olds Minivan
5. *Have you ever seen a ghost? - Nope-not my cup of tea.
6. *Where were you born? - Louisiana, MO
7. *Ever been to Alaska ? - No, but I'd love to go on an Alaskan cruise.
8. *Ever been toilet paper decorating in trees? - Yes, but not until I worked with teens (hangs head in shame.)
9. *Croutons or Bacon Bits? -Neither-sunflower seeds
10.* Favorite day of the week? - Sunday-the Lord's Day!
11. *Favorite restaurant? -
12. * Favorite Music? - It would be easier to name what I DON'T like!
13. *Favorite sport to watch?- whatever is on
14. *Favorite Drink(s): - Currently, it is a wild strawberry energy drink mix (sugar free) from Crystal Light.
15. *Favorite Ice cream: - Tin Roof Sundae
16. *Disney or Warner Brothers? - no preference
17. *Favorite fast food restaurant?* - Wendy's
18. *What color is your bedroom carpet?* - hardwood
19. *How many times you failed your driver's test?* - Never
20.* Before this one, from whom did you get your last e-mail? A client
21. *What do you do most often when you are bored?* - I don't think I know that word.
22. *Bedtime: - between 11 pm and 1 am
23. *Hobbies? - read, cook, indulge Jazzy, music, etc.
24. *Favorite TV show? - I enjoy several (Top Chef, House flipping shows, So You Think You Can Dance, American Idol, Amazing Race, CSI, NCIS, etc.)
25. *Ford or Chevy? - doesn't matter
26. *What are you listening to right now? - Top Chef on television
27. *What are your favorite colors? - right now I'm drawn to aqua and brown together
28. *How many tattoos do you have? - NONE
29. *Do you have any pets? - Two, Jazzy and Libby
30. *Which came first the chicken or the egg? - According to the Bible account of creation, that would be the chicken
31. *What would you like to accomplish before you die? - Figuring out how to be a woman of grace

Family and Friends/Old and New Part Four

Monday of our trip proved Bill right-or at least, "so far, so good." Remember how he said when his congregation prays, stuff happens? Well...we got a call-not THE call, but it could lead to that!

But let me tell you about my day up to that point.

Sunday night Taishi asked me to wake him up to go with Russ on his morning walk. Well—I decided to tag along. Healthy for me both physically and mentally, right? Right! But that big hill isn't so great going straight down and even worse going straight up-in suffocating heat and humidity no less. But it was a great thrill to spend that extra time with Taishi and to see Russ interact with him (they love talking about sports AND music). And who wouldn't want to walk down for a spectacular view of the sun coming up over the Mississippi River? (My shin splints don't get to vote!)

Monday was the day we had set aside to go visit Bill and Elaine Rubemeyer (our across-the-alley neighbors during my growing-up years). On our way there, the cell phone rang and it was the head of the pastoral search committee in Raymondville, TX. Remember what Bill said Sunday about "stuff happens when our church prays"? Well, in less than 24 hours, we got that desired phone call! We've been invited to spend 11 days in Raymondville, TX for Russ to candidate in view of a call to pastor First Baptist Church. We are so very excited of the prospects! Our hearts desire to serve in this position, and especially in a multi-cultural/Hispanic small-town area. What a great opportunity this will be! Take a look at any map of Texas, put your finger in the tip, near the Mexico border and near the San Padre islands, and you'll see why we are excited about this mission field!

I'm guessing when we stepped out of our car to visit with Bill and Elaine (after receiving that phone call) that there was an extra spring in our step or perhaps we weren't touching the ground at all!

Then, kick it up a notch to the elation of seeing the Rubemeyers. I just couldn't hug Elaine enough! The only disappointment was that Patricia wasn't able to drop by to spend extra time with us.

Monday ended with sight-seeing of our old stomping grounds.

Tuesday we had to say goodbye to family. So hard to hug everyone goodbye, unsure of when our next visit will be. No one is assured of tomorrow. When we see Taishi again, he will probably be a teenager. Imagine THAT!

We drove to Pittsfield again, and Russ went with Bill to visit some of the folks at the Southern Baptist Convention association in Springfield, IL. Phylis and I browsed at our LEISURE at stores in Pittsfield and back in my hometown of Louisiana, MO. We dined at the Eagle's Nest, which was a cozy cafe where Green's variety store used to be when I was growing up. In fact, that was where my wedding cake topper was purchased 26 years ago almost to the DAY of when I dined there this week! I needed the girlfriend time with Phylis while Bill and Russ enjoyed their time together as well.

Then our time away came to an end, and we made our way home.

We were eager to see our Jazzy girl again. Laura Dillard was holding Jazzy and watching out the door window as we walked up. Jazzy looked VERY comfortable in Laura's arms. In fact, she was glad to see us, but seemed perfectly content to just "live" there. Glad to know the Dillards made her feel like family. They said she is very smart, like she knows what you are going to do before you even do it! And they said I should write a book about her time there, and title it, "When the City Dog Goes to the Country." One day, Laura didn't want to leave Jazzy in her crate for long, so she took Jazzy to our friend Jouella's home to spend time with her dog, Onyx. They loved her so much they even called someone else who used to have a Boston Terrier to come over and play with Jazzy. Jouella said Jazzy's so smart it's almost like she speaks English-and she is so agile that she looks like a gazelle when she plays! Sounds to me like Jazzy was treated like royalty-just like Aunt Verna Jean treated us while we stayed in Clarkville!

Family and Friends/Old and New Part Three

This past Sunday was a real treat for us. We traveled to Pittsfield, IL to serve at Calvary Baptist Church pastored by our friend Bill Herald. It was great to see Bill and Phylis again. I first met Phylis on a pastors' wives e-mail group 11 years ago. Each has been there for the other many times since that first e-mail exchange.

After Sunday School we walked into the sanctuary and were greeted by my schoolgirl friend, Patricia. Look back in the archives and you will see many memories from my childhood include Patricia (aka Patty and Purple). Oh—it was so good to see her, and her hubby, Don! They scooted over in a pew, and I suddenly felt like we were teenagers again.

After the kids performed their Vacation Bible School wrap-up program, I sang "I Will Listen," originally performed by Twila Paris. And then Russ preached a great sermon that spotlighted the value of children (to go along with the VBS program). The title was "Unnamed Masterpiece." At the close of the service Bill collected a love offering for us, (which was NOT expected, but very much appreciated). He sent us to the foyer doorway to allow the congregation to greet us, and called the deacon of the week up to close in prayer. The deacon suggested they have a special prayer service for us, for God to open and close doors for us as we pursue a new ministry (Russ would LOVE to pastor again). So, we walked back down to the front of the church, and all the deacons and wives, and Bill and Phylis gathered around us, laid hands on us, and prayed for us, that Russ will soon receive a call to pastor. It was such a surprise for a deacon to care that much for someone he had just met. He had no way to know just how special this would be for us.

Bill told us that when this congregation prays, they GET results. Not that they have a hotline to God or anything, but they pray in faith, trusting God for the outcome. The church also has a prayer chapel and individuals sign up to pray for an hour, using the prayer cards provided by the church to prompt them to recall the needs of the church and the members.

Family and Friends/Old and New Part Two

It was so good to see Aunt Virginia at my cousin's wedding. She has overcome some great trials these last 12 months. We lost Uncle Skillet (who treated her like a Princess for almost 60 years of marriage). She was diagnosed with breast cancer and endured surgery and treatment for that. And she moved out of a home she had lived in for at least 50 years. That's one strong woman!

We arrived early for the outdoor wedding of my cousin Kristy's daughter Nicole. Nicole was about 5 when my dad died-she was so special to him-like a grandchild really. I'm so glad Dad had Nicole and Matt to "love on" since he died before Wade married Kana and they had Taishi.

Kristy worked feverishly on all the last minute details of the wedding while the wedding party posed for pictures. Especially smile-inducing was the antics of Dean, Kristy's grandson. I had heard "brags" of this 2.5 year old, but figured the raves were skewed by a Great-grandmother's bias. Not so. He was all that and MORE. So photogenic and all boy. His face tattled on his thoughts—so animated!

The wedding ceremony celebrated the happy couple's friendship. Not so happy was the weather-with near 100 degrees and near 100% humidity. Rivulets of sweat trickled between my should blades, despite the wedding-fans that were distributed (like the old-fashioned paper funeral fans of days gone by). Iced bottled water also available during the wedding quenched the thirst but didn't put the "fire" out!

We drove to the country club for the reception. Each table was graced with miniature bottles of bubble-blowing liquid for guests to create an archway of bubbles through which the bride and groom entered. Each table also had silver bells to ring to encourage the bride and groom to kiss. Guests were equipped with disposable cameras, to record all the evening's activities.

It meant a lot to attend, to represent the well-wishes my father would have wanted for Nicole on her wedding day (as well as my own).

Family and Friends/Old and New Part One

Last week we dropped off Jazzy (our not quite 2 year old Boston Terrier) at a friend's home so we could attempt a REAL getaway. Thanks, Dillards, for treating Jazzy like one of your own. You went way above and beyond the call of friendship duty! Jazzy acclimated immediately, and we were on our way.

We drove from Southwest Kentucky up to Clarksville, Missouri for a long weekend. When we arrived, my mom, and Aunt Verna Jean and Uncle Lewis burst out the door to greet us with welcoming hugs. What a reception! I had not seen my mom in 15 months, and my Aunt and Uncle in years. The family "reunion" had begun!

Then my brother Wade and his 11-year-old son Taishi returned from playing tennis. I had not seen them in 3 years (they live in Japan with my sister-in-law Kana). Quite a difference between an 8-year-old nephew and an 11-year-old! Taishi did an amazing job with English, considering it is his second language. Wade and Kana have certainly raised him right!

Aunt Verna had planned our menu for the entire time, and she spoiled us like royalty. Everyone needs a vacation like that from time to time!

On Saturday more family came in from out of town, prior to the wedding. My Aunt Deanna and Uncle Bob drove down from Waterloo, IA with my cousin Sonya. And my cousin Valinda drove my Aunt Virginia up for the ceremony and reception from St. Louis. What fun to see all my cousins in their 40s-many of us experiencing those midlife hot flashes!

Aunt Deanna and Sonya have both been e-mail buddies of mine for a couple of years, so I finally got to turn those virtual hugs into reality. YAY!

Living the Dream!

Yesterday Russ left for camp with the teens. I had determined to try to make this a high-impact freelance project week. Almost like I get a 5 day writer's retreat! Russ was not all that excited about going to camp-but they needed a male counselor and he had the time free, and he gets paid.

Monday I found out I would have 3 business phone calls. Only one problem. The cordless phone was off-kilter on the base, so it wasn't charged. ARGH! And the corded phone had so many sound problems-the voice on the other end was muffled to near silence and so I picked up about one in every ten words. So then I took the filter off the phone, and I heard the voice better, but I also heard fax-like noises. I called my friend Amy (hi, Amy!) and she said she couldn't hear the noises on her end so at least I wasn't going to blast out the listener!

Phone call #1 was with another publishing house who wants to use my freelance services. I'm excited!


Phone call #2 was with an author about a compilation book I'm co-compiling. I wanted to pick the brain of Wayne Holmes because he is known as one of the "compilation kings." I've heard of him online but never spoken with him. He e-mailed and suggested we talk by phone-he was willing to help me brainstorm the project and helped me know how to write up guidelines and contracts for each contributing author. Wayne's books include: The Heart of a Father, The Heart of a Mother, The Heart of a Teacher, The Embrace of a Father, and others. Odd thing is—Wayne lives in Cincinnati and I never did meet him when I had the chance! We both belong to the Christian Humor Writers group. See: http://watkins.gospelcom.net/christianhumorwriters.htm
and also at: http://www.christianhumorwriters.com

Anyway-the call with Wayne went great. I told him my plans for the book and he said I was headed in the right direction. It was reassuring to know I had done my research well! He gave me some other great ideas and I'm glad I had the opportunity to visit with him by phone. What a NICE man!

Phone Call #3-was a writer's coach client of mine. We visit 2-3 times a month by phone to talk over her project. She's always a blessing to me. (Thanks Sheryl!)

Also yesterday I received an e-mail from the coordinator of the SomeOne Cares conference. I'm doing PR for that event. We are already making preliminary plans for at least 3 conferences next year (hinging on if this one is a success). One event will be in Hawaii where the coordinator resides. Well, she e-mailed me yesterday and said she wouldn't be able to fly as many speakers over for the Hawaiian conference, but she was wondering if I had some topics in mind to be a workshop speaker for the event, and not just the publicist. Wowzer! She would pay my way to Hawaii??!!!! So, I'm supposed to "try out" by suggesting some workshop ideas to either assist caregivers or to train ministry teams who will be ministering to caregivers in their churches. If you have an idea for a subject that goes along with caregiving, let me know! So far I have:
• Getting On Top Of Your Emotions
• Too Stressed to Care (how stress affects women)
• How NOT to Care (a play on What Not to Wear)
• Why Won't God Heal My Loved One?
• Frequent Flyer Miles from Guilt Trips
• How to Deal with Unmet Expectations
• Care Enough to _______ the Very Best
• Weary in Well Doing

I went to bed late and woke up today anticipating my time at the Ladies Night Out tonight. But first, I had a phone call from Russ. Guess what? He is really enjoying the camp experience and I think it is encouraging him. YAY! I think it is a good getaway for him. They are meeting on a college campus. I'm thrilled for him to have a good week. He needs it and deserves it!

I spoke at a Ladies Nite Out for First Baptist Church, Clinton, KY tonight. You have to realize that this town only has 1350 population. I'm not much one for "signs" or "voices" when it comes to God speaking to a person-but when we first started planning this event, I felt like we were going to have 50 women at the Ladies Nite Out. They've never really had this large of a women's event at a residence. The hostess was expecting 30. I prepared her for 50. We ended up with 47 women, and 2 who signed up had something come up and couldn't be there (but called). That would be 49. Very close to that 50 mark I had in mind. For a town of 1350, that's HUGE!

But much more important than the numbers are the details of the night. We suggested women bring salads or desserts. The variety was amazing. Not a duplicate dish among them! And honestly, I couldn't have asked for a caterer to do a better job. The food wasn't just good, it was beautiful. One of the ladies brought a bouquet of flowers from her own garden in a crystal vase for our centerpiece and it looked it it just came from a Victoria Magazine photo shoot! The hostess had a screened in porch and a patio that she used to set up intimate card tables and chairs. With tablecloths, it looked just like a tea room! She was so gracious to open her home to all of us. The fellowship and the intimacy was "just what the doctor ordered" for this hurting church family (they've gone through a lot this past year).

All the ladies came inside for the "program," and I shared some of my story with them. For starters, I played a game by having them guess my age, then guess how many surgeries I've had (and add that to my age), and how many addresses I've had (and add that all together). The one closest to the correct number won a prize-one of the Groovy Chicks books that has part of my story in it. Can you guess the number? It is 81!

It seems like the speech went well-just enough humor interspersed to lighten the message. I might have stuck my foot in my mouth a couple of times-saying something that could be misunderstood. I hate it when that happens! So, on the way home, rather than basking in the joy of a night of blessing, I was concerned about being misinterpreted. Don'tcha just hate it when that happens? So, before going night-night, I just had to get my mind back in focus and leave the results of the talk up to God. It's in His hands. As the ladies left, most took the time to hug me and thank me for sharing from my life with them. It's a risk to be transparent, but it's worth it!

Great beginning to an equally great week!

AWOL

Okay, I admit it. I've been AWOL. Absent While Out Living. That's right. Life happens. And when it does, to-do lists get prioritized and judgments are made between want-tos and have-tos.

Did I mention that in June I received a promotion to Director of Publicity? Oh-and did I mention that in July I resigned from that same job? I loved what I did there, but it just was not a good fit. Better to admit that and move on—right? It certainly was a difficult decision. Especially since I'm the primary breadwinner right now. Or I should say I WAS the primary breadwinner!

We are fully relying on God to open doors and supply for needs. His provision is sufficient. Again, we have to weigh out our wants and our needs. The best part of all of this is that we have become even MORE available to whatever God wants in our lives. I'm not sure that was even possible. It seemed we had surrendered all to God. But for the last couple of months we were waiting for life to happen to us, and now we are out seeking opportunities. We have become proactive in looking for that open door from God.

The most exciting part of this journey is that we are ready for Russ to pastor again. We've BEEN ready, but after a large number of unsuccessful attempts to apply for church openings, we had sort of back-burnered our attempts to get the word out that Russ is looking. It's so frustrating to hear the statistics for pastor-less churches-we just want to say "We will take you!" But they have to take US! That's a much longer process.

In the mean time, life goes on. I've gone back to my freelancer roots, and am exploring many different great opportunities (some pay up front and some pay if they pan out). I'm working as: writer, editor, speaker, book doctor, writer's coach, publicist, etc. Keep me in mind for your next project!

I was thrilled to get a great endorsement from a writer I met at my last job. She wrote:


It was a privilege to work with Kathy Carlton Willis for the promotion of my latest book. As a publicist she is sharp, creative, and enthusiastic. As a person, she is confident, competent, and a joy to work with. She has a superb knowledge of the industry and was willing to go the extra mile and think outside the box to maximize my publicity campaign. Before I worked with Kathy, I dreaded PR. But Kathy made the process both effective and a pleasure. I can’t recommend her highly enough.

--Marlo Schalesky, author of 5 books including VEIL OF FIRE, with upcoming books including BEYOND THE NIGHT and FACES IN THE SAND

Well, I'll close this tardy epistle...until next time.

I Feel Pretty! Oh So Pretty! (OK I don't, but I like the song!)

It's been weeks and weeks since I've had a "day of beauty." Before I went to teach at a writers conference in Elizabethtown last week, I colored my hair (and LOVE it!). But my hair...really needed shaped up. I don't know WHY I kept putting off making an appointment. I guess I hate trying to find someone new. And I hate taking the time to go. And I hate spending the money. And I'm afraid they'll mess it up. That's a lot of ANDS!

Then there's my crusty feet, arthritic bone spurs and stubby toes. Not exactly model feet for sandal-wearing! It's summer for goodness sake. I needed a pedicure! I'm not so good at giving myself "the works" because I have that spinal cord implant that looks sort of like a metal tape measure in my belly. Not great for bending over longterm.

So, today I went to a new spa salon in town called Bella Amici. I had a nice relaxing shampoo in a comfy reclining chair, a careful layered haircut, a style, then some thinning shears, and hair product. After that, it was over to the spa table-to have my eyebrows waxed.

The finishing touch was the spa pedicure. She spent an hour on my feet! The best part was the girlfriend-style conversation that happened the whole time. And my favorite radio station was playing in the background.

I was there for almost 2.5 hours, and the "spa experience" only cost $56! That's not bad for all I had done. Cheaper than what I found in Northern Kentucky, for certain! I WILL go back!

I came home entirely relaxed. I needed that in the WORST way. So glad I decided to splurge.

Oh-and we had some excitement at the salon while I was there. When the stylist cut my hair, I noticed five young teen boys playing with bottle rockets and firecrackers right by my van! I said something to my beautician, and she said something to another gal, who went and got the owner of the shop! The owner opened the door and yelled at the boys, "you are too close to my customers cars with those firecrackers. You need to move!"

Just at that moment a police car comes into sight. The leader of the pack yells to the owner, "Did you call the cops?!"

The owner denied calling (we didn't!). But next think we knew, two police officers and two car, are out front and one of the officers is giving a stern lecture to the boys. They split up and went their separate ways. But one kid stayed behind and jumped in a van in the lot. Then we realized he was the child of one of the ladies in the tanning booth. Ru-ro for the owner. What if the kid tells the mom that the owner called the cops on them (even though she didn't). So, the owner then had to tell the customer what happened when she came out of the booth. It was a little awkward, but still...No kid should have firecrackers of any kind in the city limits, let alone in a parking lot full of cars! That's a no-brainer!

After all the excitement of my spa day, I headed for home.

Home, with a meal of meatloaf made with onions and red bell pepper and half a bagel crumbed up and milk and egg and ground beef chuck. Topped with ketchup and sorghum syrup stirred together. Baked until crunchy on the outside and moist inside. Also had a stir fry of yellow squash, fresh tomato, red bell pepper, and onion. Also had some rolls hot from the oven. And the crowning glory was the ten cent corn on the cob that was TO DIE FOR! It was sweet and just right-not too crunchy and not too mushy. Oh-and for dessert I made a concoction. First I put together cubed angel food cake and sliced fresh peaches. Then I boiled water, put in diet peach flavored jello, with diet Sundrop rather than cold water. This mixture went over the cake and peaches. I let this set up and served it with light cool-whip. YUMMO!

I'm going to rest well tonight after such an indulgent day!

Can You Go Back?

Last weekend Russ and I traveled up to our old stomping grounds to attend his family reunion. Can you say ROAD TRIP?! We were something like 7 hours on the road with Jazzy, the Boston Terrier cruiser. On the way, we stopped at Lamberts, the "throwed roll" place. YUMMO!

Then, we veered off course to stop in Louisiana, Missouri. Russ and I were both born in that town, grew up there, and became the cliche' of the late 70s when we met as high school sweethearts. For this road trip we wanted to see the Mississippi River. You just can't take the river out of a river-town kid. I remember my dad letting us get Dairy Queen treats and driving us to the river to watch the boats, barges, and fishermen go by. On this trip to the river, since we had no kids in tow, we took our Jazzy to see how she would react. She very cautiously walked up to the water,and every time the water would lap up onto the edge, she'd back away like she had seen a ghost. Then she would creep back to river, curiosity getting the best of her, only to get scared by the next splash of water—water that smelled like fish and mud. Thirsty, her tastes ran more for the bottled water in the car than the stinky Mississippi River. Silly girl!

While walking the Riverfront, I saw a gentleman working outside a building. I wondered who he was. Then it dawned on me that any middle-aged person in this town was probably someone I went to school with. Oh yeah! I wasn't 18 anymore. I left the town at that age and still felt I was that age when I returned. These people who looked like my parents were really my classmates. Am I really that old? I'm actually OLDER than my mom was when I left Louisiana. I was tripping on this trip down memory lane!

The town itself looked cleaner and quainter than I remember seeing a few years ago. It was no longer MY town, but it looked like a place where I'd go antiquing. Would I find remnants of MY childhood in the antique shops?

When Did I Become Middle Aged?

Yesterday I noticed a boy running across the road. I laughed because he looked like he was running across hot coals. I first thought, "boys are so awkward at that age—and goofy too!" Then I looked down. He was barefoot! Asphalt on a 93 degree sunny day probably did feel a LOT like hot coals! I laughed again and said, "what a stupid kid, to go barefoot on such a hot surface."

Then came the groan. Almost like the V-8 commercial's bop on the forehead, I remembered my own childhood summertime barefoot antics. My soles became so calloused they developed almost a Teflon coating. I could walk barefoot on any surface. Of course, the rough shards of glass brought me crying back home for my mom to make all-better.

I loved that time in my life. Not a care in the world. It didn't matter how I looked. It only mattered that I embraced life with gusto.

Somewhere along the way,I changed. Now there are rules and regs to living life. To being just "so."

When did I hit middle-age and how can I bring back some of that summertime carefree living?

Maybe chasing fireflies at night and making glow-in-the-dark jewelry will be a start. Wish me luck!

Unfortunately, the next time I find my childhood again, I'll be in Depends and live in the imaginary world of senility. While I still have my mind, I pray I can embrace that childhood spirit once more!

Random Thoughts

I keep meaning to write, but life happens and I don't take time to jot it down. So, here are just a few random thoughts that I keep intending to post here on the blog.

• While at the writers conference, I was assigned a table for lunch and dinner. Since I was faculty, I was expected to sit at this table, and then people who want to bend my ear can choose to sit at the table (the students get to pick where they sit for meals, the faculty are assigned tables). Since so many folks misunderstand what we do at GRPR, it was funny, yet uncomfortable, to watch writers walk up to my table, read my sign, and then tell me they didn't need me and moved on to other tables. What they don't know is that the really DO need us! We start with the manuscripts and offer content edits and line edits, then write book proposals, help connect them with agents, do their publicity (television, radio, magazines, newspapers, internet, blog tours), and we even have a speakers bureau for novelists. So we have a lot of everything to offer, but others just don't know it. So, I would sit at my table, very lonely, feeling like the last girl to get picked for dodge ball teams or something. Usually, I would eat my entire meal before the last of the conferees came to sit at my table as the last open spots. Okay-it wasn't ALWAYS that bad-sometimes folks from my workshops or my one-on-one appointments would recognize me and come sit with me. But sometimes, it felt very much like getting picked LAST. I just need to network more during the general sessions and encourage people to come look me up at meal time.

• It's seems like a blast from the past to move here to Fulton, KY. People don't lock their cars here (some even leave their keys in the car). House doors aren't locked during daytime, but some do at night. We went to the local grocery story, and it was like going to the J & M market in my hometown of Louisiana, MO. It is owned by a family who actually works there. The store is set up like a grocery, not a supermarket. We kept waiting to be offered little tickets or stickers to save up to earn dishes or something. It is really like living 30 years behind the times here, in many ways.

• Speaking of memories, we were staying with Vickie and Casey, and with our biscuits they served Sugar Cane Syrup. It tasted sort of like Sorghum, but not as strong. Just very good flavor. Now I want to find some! Anyway, the taste reminded me of some tastes we had in my childhood. Mom-did we ever have Sugar Cane Syrup? This is really really good!

• We still have boxes surrounding us, but it is getting better. Russ and I are both working long hours, so the boxes have to come last on our priorities. We do just a few a day. Russ did a lot of work while I was away-scrubbing down the moldy basement walls with bleach water, and painting the basement floor. He also painted the office walls (changed from aqua with a tropical fish border, to a neutral cream). This isn't the home we were going to buy, but at least we are in a place of our own. And we will keep an eye out for a place to buy while we are renting. No hurry!

Sunday Sightings

Today I just want to share a few observations from a very different "day in the life."

They will be totally unrelated ponderings and postulations...

(For those picking up in the middle, I'm writing this entry from Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference in North Carolina)

Here goes:

• My 9-hour bus ride yesterday was eye-opening. I'm not even sure how to describe the education I received from the trip. I overheard descriptions that would have been censored from the sex ed for prisoners 101 manual. I saw some hardworking folks just trying to make an honest living, some young mothers traveling home to be with family or friends, some folks who weren't feeling well who should have left their viruses at home, and some young adults who had more ambition than gas money to travel cross country. It was an amazing journey. If a writer can't find "fodder" on a bus trip halfway across the country, then she should just hang up her writer's cap.

• After several incidents occurring these past few weeks, I understand much better the saying regarding "faithful are the wounds of a friend" and the whole need for "iron sharpening iron." When friends hold me accountable, it might sting, but because I know they love me, I can swallow the medicine. I know they have no other motivation than my good and God's glory when they suggest a change of attitude or actions. On the other hand, when someone who does NOT hold my heart in their hands tries to sling harsh words at me or about me, I need to learn how to not let it get under my skin as well as not weigh on my tender heart. I do realize that there are often seeds of truth in even the most wicked criticism, and I pray for awareness of that knowledge. But I also know that when those who have ought against me say stinging words, their only motivation may not be for my good, but to put me in a place where they can step on me. I pray God will show me the difference-the times I need to learn a lesson, and the times I need to just "let it go."

• Today I attended a worship service with the other faculty arriving early to the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference. Alton Gansky was the speaker. He made the book of 3rd John come to life for me. No coincidence in the timing of the lesson. Here are the basics from the Bible study today:

HOW DO YOU WANT TO BE REMEMBERED?
What words do you want associated with your name when others remember you?

John calls 3 people by name-and describes them to us.

1. Gaius-beloved elder. John loved him in truth. He prayed the prayer that we should pray for all our loved ones-a prayer for health and prosperity. In fact, he was a man of truth inside and out of church:
truth possessor (internal)
truth walker (actions)
truth supporter (giver of others who walked in truth)

2. Diotrephes-a church leader who blocked what John wrote so the others couldn't read it, and opposed him. Diotrephes desired the prominent recognition and position, and did not accept what the apostles had to say. John promised to call attention to it the next time he came to visit. Diotrephes unjustly accused these men of God, using wicked words. He also forbid others to agree with John's team, and if they did so, he put them out of his church. John warns us NOT to imitate Diotrephes.

3. Demetrius-received a good testimony from everyone, from the Truth itself, and from John and his team. His testimony was TRUE.

God gives us the gift of choice. We get to choose our life direction, and how we are remembered. We will be remembered for our actions, our responses, and our words. Who do we choose to be like? One of these three men? Keeping in mind that our great purpose is to bring glory to our Creator and God, what choice will I make?

This great lesson came to me for such a time as this! I need to know that not everyone will have my good at heart, and might even say cruel things about me and encourage others not to fellowship with me. But my choice is in how I will respond. Will it please my Heavenly Father?

Rather than spending time responding, today I choose to look ahead and see what God has for me on this NEW DAY. How can I encourage the writers gathering as I write this blog entry here at this beautiful Ridgecrest campus? Let me see their needs, and put my own needs on the back burner. The blessing is knowing how God works-when I see others as Christ sees them, that He will also burden someone else to see my needs, and will equip them with ways to meet my needs. I'm not ministering to others BECAUSE of it being reciprocal, but I can rest in Him, knowing that I am being taken care of. I pray my motives are pure and my intent is full surrender.

• At dinner tonight I got to meet an acquaintance from an online writers' group. The really cool thing is we hit it off right away, and she said she is interested in talking to me about being a part of her team in an upcoming project that could become as national as Women of Faith. I would freelance some work for her. She sounded pretty serious, in that she gave me her card and requested mine, so already God is putting people in my path. I know that a reputable organization is already footing the bill for her first conference, so this is not a pipe dream, but a project of great worth. I'm excited for her, and excited for the possibility to be a part of it!

• Tonight's keynote speaker was a friend of mine-Jim Watkins. He did a great job on the topic of "I Am A Giant Killer." He revised the biblical accounting of David and Goliath to fit writers slaying the scary editors (in getting our work published rather than rejected by them). It was a great message-both humorous and thought provoking. And the thing he ended with is what I'm pondering tonight. What are the giants in my life right now? I'm praying for God to equip me to slay these giants. If I'm being transparent (and that's just how I am), I'd have to say my giants are:
1. me fluctuating between battling pride and low self-esteem. Either I wonder if someone will notice me for "such and such" or I tell myself I'm not good enough to measure up. This is a continual struggle for me, and I think it is a universal struggle. My ONLY identify should be in Christ-and in that identify I'm uniquely designed to be exactly what God wants me to be. And when I give myself that sort of affirmation, I can take the focus off of self, and then I won't battle pride and I won't battle low self-esteem.
2. having so many dreams and aspirations, and so little time and energy. I pray the Lord continues to refine me and show me His purpose in me so I only commit to those projects He would have me to do.
3. wanting to live up to the expectations of others. No matter how hard I try...I just can't do it. And you know what? It's wrong of me to place that sort of pressure on myself.
4. having the wrong expectations for others. The shoe is on the other foot here. I need to want less when it comes to others. It's not about what they can do for me, but what can I do for them.
5. time wasters. I still need to identify those things that waste my time and cause me to feel "up against the clock" when it comes to self-imposed deadlines.

• After the evening meeting, one of the agents made a beeline for me. He said he had been wanting to meet me for quite some time, and was glad to put a face with a name. We know each other from having some of the same clients, and also from being in the same writers' online group. He picked my brain for a bit, dished about work, and then there was a line forming of other people wanting to talk to him. It meant a lot for him to take time out of his busy night to have face time with me, because I knew he will only be at the conference for another day and must leave early. So he had many folks to meet in just a short period of time. But probably what made my day the MOST was that he sought ME out. WHY? Because back in 2003 I was a budding author with bigger dreams than training, and I sent him a very "green" book proposal, asking him to consider being my agent. He took the proposal to the committee and they turned me down. He let me down easy, but he had to decline being my agent because they did not get a unanimous consent to do so. So for him to WANT to meet me now, just meant so much to me!

• The blessings of this day, were just as if God was gifting me with the sort of refreshment I needed:
-challenging messages to edify me to grow, not just as a writer, but as a Christian
-words of affirmation to build me back up after a time of being torn down in other situations
-new friends and business acquaintances and new potential business dealings

It's as if God was filling me up today, so that tomorrow when the "press of the crowds" come-the ones who want time with me so I can show them how to grow as a writer-my cup will not go dry from being poured out to others. It's as if God made sure I was so full of good stuff today that it overflowed to the saucer for lack of space inside. Now I can be used by Him and not be drained, but energized!

Greetings from Ridgecrest, North Carolina

Perhaps you're confused. I just greeted you from North Carolina, but you are pretty certain I just moved to Southwestern Kentucky. Well...you'd be right!

We moved into a cute 1940s 2 bedroom 1 bath rental on Friday. We were up raring to go first thing, and met the Realtor to get the key. Then we went to the house first, to appraise the situation and develop a plan of attack. What we saw caused our hearts to plummet to the basement. It was NOT in move-in condition. We found the bathroom had caked-on dirt, the kitchen was nasty-with grimy ovens, and food-stained refrigerator. The cabinets needed washed down. Dust half-an-inch thick on all the beautiful woodwork in all the rooms, carpets that reeked, etc. And when we went down to the basement, where we planned to store our spare bed and be my craft room-they hadn't even removed a stinky king-size bed, piled high with dirty clothes, and they had left their washer and dyer too. The odor everywhere was enough to knock you over, so we opened every window in the house.

Then we went back down to the Realtor to explain our situation, who contacted the owner and let him know this was NOT acceptable, and negotiated a deal. She said for the many hours of labor (or hiring a cleaner) that we should get the rest of this month free rent. He was agreeable to that and very sorry for our inconvenience. From there we went to Dollar General and bought $60 worth of cleaning supplies. He came over later that morning to get the rest of his stuff, and also consented to letting us paint. The 2nd bedroom, to be the office, is in aqua with a big tropical fish chair rail wallpaper border, the kitchen had 1 coat of red that didn't quite make it to the ceiling, although touches of it landed on the ceiling, and the 1 coat was too thin to cover, the dining room and living room of the house has a medium powder blue with matching carpet. Our bedroom was most tasteful in a pink wall with burgundy floral border, but still didn't match a thing we had. Bedrooms have hardwood floors-wish we could rip the carpet up from the two living areas to get rid of odor, and look better too! They did use a carpet shampooer, but it just brought the odor to the surface.

We really LIKE the rental, and it has tons of closet space. But it will be too small for our permanent residence, and they are asking too much for that area for an older home of that size. We are just grateful to have it!

So, after doing desk-work for months, I was doing manual labor all day. Oh my aching bones! haha! It felt good to scrub away the grime and see instant results-also rewarding and refreshing to put my mind in neutral and just clean!

Then on Saturday it was up and attum to travel 1 hour to the greyhound bus station to hop a bus for Asheville, NC. I was on a bus or in a terminal for almost 10 hours! Everything that was sore, at that point became stiff. And my oh my did I see, hear, and smell every sort of person on God's green earth!

I do recall sleeping off and on during the trip and reading a good book to occupy my time. I even saw a black bear on my way up the mountains to Asheville. Some volunteers from the center came to pick me up, and helped me check in here at Lifeway's Ridgecrest Retreat Center. I slept SOUNDLY for over 8 hours-a first in several months! I'm serving on faculty here, and will meet some other early-bird arrivals for worship in a little bit. Then we'll have a picnic lunch, spend the afternoon getting acquainted with the facility, have orientation, and at dinnertime the fun begins with the arrival of the writers.

Why Do They Do That?

Just this weekend I've been doing some soul searching regarding why some people can be "friends" for a while, and then turn on you and become cruel, mocking your prayer requests and attacking your reputation (some call it character assassination). I've just heard of at least 3 others who have recently gone through very similar problems. This isn't just a church problem, it is a universal problem.

With many of these situations, I decided God did not want me to get defensive. That truth would prevail. I know God doesn't want me to run away from conflict, but yet I also know He doesn't expect me to continue to expose myself to abuse. I do not need to "take it" when it comes to the doses of toxic "Christianity." It is similar to small doses of arsenic, which, when accumulated, can poison the recipient.

Why would others treat me this way? Maybe it is one of these reasons:

• they don't understand
• they're jealous
• they are hiding their own faults
• they aren't praying for me
• they assume the wrong things
• they are afraid the same trial I'm going through will happen to them
• they are unempathetic/unsympathetic
• they are hardened
• they are not in the Word
• they lack the fruit of the Spirit
• they are hurting, and we know that hurt people hurt people

Thinking through all of this helps me know how to better pray for the ones who have caused this hurt. And praying for them helps my pain diminish, as I continue to forgive them for their continued attacks.

I try to be transparent, but it leaves me feeling "naked" and vulnerable. Then I'm open for the pot shots. But I don't know how to wear a mask--they are too suffocating, I only know how to be me.

I'm working tons of hours, have wonderful Christian fellowship with some faithful friends, and can fill my time with other things that God has for me. So for me, I choose to move on. How did I get to this place? By evaluating why others would be this way, and how God would have me to act in return.

Bullies only bully those they can pick on. Once they see they can't rattle you, they move on too.

All of this heart-searching has caused me to be more conscientious of how my own words, actions, and attitudes might hurt others. E-mails can be particularly stinging because there is no body language or voice inflection to help read between the lines. I would rather remain silent than say something that could be misinterpreted. I know I've not been perfect when it comes to my part in relationships, but I hope because of my own experiences I will be more cautious not to hurt others.

Mama Said There'd Be Days Like This

Remember the song "Mama Said There'd Be Days Like This"? I saw a book by the same title last night. I can't really remember what the song was about, and I didn't pick up the book to know what it is about, but that title GRABS me! So, here's my 2007 list of things my mama taught me about living on those "days like this." Of course, sometimes there are days, and sometimes there are months!

Mama said-
• Some people are just ugly, even when they are beautiful on the outside, and usually kids and dogs can tell which ones have that beautiful spirit from the ones who don't.
• Don't trust anyone but yourself, and God. It will keep you from getting burned.
• Sometimes what you don't say says more about you than what you do say.
• Life isn't fair, especially when it comes to work and friendships.
• If you don't stand on your own two feet, who do you expect to stand on your feet for you?

But Mama also said-
• Hard work is reward enough in itself.
• Being nice to everyone really won't hurt you, even when it feels like it might.
• Remember your roots and be kind to those who have less than you do.
• Working outside is the best antidepressant there is.
• Mentoring someone else by investing your time and talent is one of the best way to make effective change, one person at a time.

Okay, my mama didn't say all these statements, but her life showed me these things over the past 44 years. She equipped me for "days like this."

Thanks, Mom! Happy Mother's Day!

The Learning Curve

We didn't get the house. And we've had so many kind words from friends and loved ones regarding this disappointing news. I'm not really feeling emotion. No anger. No sadness. Maybe I'm numb. I don't know. My boss, Rebeca, said she would have lost it so many times by now. I am just literally living a day at a time. Maybe that's where God wants me right now. Trusting Him for the daily bread, and daily shelter too.

At age 44, I guess I never thought I'd have to depend on someone else for my housing. Through this, I've seen how easy it is to become homeless in the richest country of the world. So sad. I will have more compassion for those who have come upon hard times because of this. It blows my mind that I can make more than the median income for Fulton, KY and run into this many problems just to find a place to live.

We are looking at a little house to rent, or an upstairs apartment of an old quad-plex. We'll know more tomorrow about where we will land.

Thanks for continuing to pray. I know I'm so blessed compared to the majority of the world. This whole experience has humbled me and shown me a lot about myself.

Russ and I both realize that since 2002 we have been thrown into a huge "Life Learning Curve." It's turned our world upside down, made us throw away several thought-processes that were just plain WRONG, and opened our mind to what God would have for us.

Thanks for going the long haul with me on this journey!

The Birth of The Staff Guy!

Today was the birth of The Staff Guy. Check out the new Web Site at: http://www.TheStaffGuy.com

A New Day!

Today was the first day of my husband's new ministry. Russ filled in as "music man" at First Baptist Church of Clinton, KY today. He went Wednesday for some preliminary stuff, but today was his first full day. We went early enough to make sure everything was ready to go, and then attended Sunday School. It was quite enjoyable. And then came church. Even though it was our first Sunday morning there, it seemed like we fit in just like family. Russ did a great job leading music (I had no doubt!), and we enjoyed the interim pastor's sermon. After morning worship we met with the choir, and others interested in music. They haven't had a choir since Christmas, so even though many choirs take a break for summer, this one desires to get started and move forward. Some are still mourning the passing of their previous music director, who did their music off and on for about 30 years. My heart goes out to them, because this transition period must be difficult for them. I pray we minister to them in their time of need.

After the meeting we went out to eat with a couple of the deacon's and some of their family. I felt like we had known them forever. Just so easy to visit. I truly believe because the same Spirit Who lives in me lives in them, we are connected by an invisible force that paves the way for a sort of kinship.

Also, I can't not mention the food at the restaurant! It was a simple buffet but the food was like the cooking I had growing up. Fried Chicken, Meatloaf, Pork Loin, Black Eyed Peas, White Creamed Corn from scratch, mashed potatoes, fried okra, greens, green beans, rolls, salad and fruit bar, and chocolate cake for dessert. YUM.

We go back tonight to continue our time at First Baptist and will find out soon what the details are regarding our ministry time with this church. It's a privilege to serve!

(Oh...and for those of you wanting to know about our house situation: we still have not closed on the house. More mess-ups and more phone calls up the ladder at the bank. I think we must have gotten through to them because they have offered us an in-house loan if we can't get this loan they offered to us, which means a same day issuance so we could get the paperwork to the seller's attorney to draw up the HUD and finally close this thing. One way or the other, as long as the seller is agreeable to extend our contract, we will close by this Friday. This Missourian will believe it when she sees it at this point, saying, "SHOW ME!")

The Saga Continues

We didn't close today, and found out that it could actually take as much as a WEEK more. Since Wednesday we've been told there was just ONE document left (a correction from the appraiser), but actually after that, it still has to have the letter of "cleared to close" from the mortgage company, and up until that time they can always find something else to request from somewhere. From there the seller's attorney still has to draw up the HUD papers, and then that all gets overnighted to the closing attorney, and THEN we close.

Russ did talk with someone higher up the ladder at the bank, and they are appalled at the service we've gotten. He had our loan officer in with him, on speaker phone, and several things came to light that the boss didn't know the loan officer had done (or not done that should have been done). So, now we are at least offered a plan B. If the loan officer cannot get the paperwork we need by noon on Monday to send to the seller's attorney-to get a closing later in the week, then the boss will take over and do an IN-HOUSE loan, at 90% instead of 100% of the loan, and we will have more cost up front, but we can get in the house. We offered to do a 90% loan when we first applied, and they said there was no such thing at their bank. WRONG. We offered again when they switched loan officers on us to try for a 90% loan, and they still said there was no such thing. Well, there IS such a loan at their bank!

The level of their incompetency amazes me. Anyway, we have a Plan B in place, but that's only IF the seller agrees to extend the contract deadline-which currently is May 8th, but now we are requesting as late as May 11th. We'll know more Monday, one way or the other...

Thanks for everyone's prayers!

If God is writing a book of our lives, He has included all the page-turner drama and conflict necessary to be a good read. What sort of genre would it be? It would read like a horror story at times! At least our marriage provides the romantic element of the book. So maybe it is more like a "cozy mystery."

I know God is ultimately in control, but that sometimes the free will of man can mess up what God wants best for us. But He can still use all the "mess ups" and make something good out of it. He already knows the end result, and I can rest in that truth.

Through all of this I've learned just how much of my life is NOT in my hands. I have to trust God even when I cannot trust others. I'm not the one in control. I'm not the boss of me, and I'm for SURE not the boss of anyone else. The universe does not revolve around ME. And what matters so much to me is not important at all to most other people. Knowing that, I move on. I face reality and I make the best decisions I can with the choices given to me, based on the direction God gives me through wise counselors, through His peace, and from His Word.

The rest, is OUT OF MY HANDS.

Here We "Grow" Again

We were all set to close today on our house, with a conditional approval from the bank. Utilities are arranged to be turned on today. But, we do not have confirmation that the appraiser turned in the documents the underwriter requested of him. The sad thing is, they requested it Wednesday morning, and all they needed were some comps (comparisons of other houses that sold in the area) that would back up the appraisal he gave our home. I guess the ones he turned in didn't measure up. But our Realtor had several that worked, so she sent everything the appraiser needed to do his job, TO him, and all he needs to do is transfer the information to his own letterhead. He said he would get it done by Wednesday night, but as of Thursday night we do not have confirmation that he did what he promised he would do. And since it needs to be overnighted, it is quite possible we will not make it to closing today. UNLESS he did send it and just will not return everyone's calls for whatever reason. We'll find out today when the businesses open. What is frustrating is that the comps he sent in did at least back up the loan value of our home, it's just that he said our home was valued at $20,000 more than the loan amount, and for some reason they want the comps to back THAT number up even though his comps DO back up the loan amount. UGH!

So, it may mean we lose the opportunity of having this weekend to work on the house while we are both off and also while our "muscle power" is off.

We need one more round of prayers, that all the documents are in so we can close on the house. We for sure have it, we just need all the paperwork to be there before we can get in.

Kentucky Christian Writers Conference

I'm going to be at a writers conference coming up, and I'd like to get the word out about this one because it would be great to meet some of you there. It is the Kentucky Christian Writers' Conference, to be held on Friday and Saturday, June 22 - 23, 2007, at Grace Heartland Church in Elizabethtown, Kentucky.

Go to for more info on this. Now, for my part of the news:

I'm going to be co-teaching a Fiction Workshop with Virginia Smith. Here is the workshop overview:

Workshop Overview:
A Novel Approach to Fiction will teach writers the necessary elements for writing compelling fiction. Our “tag-team teachers” will discuss every part of the process, from character development to storyboarding the plot, to polishing your prose. If you want to write fiction, or if you already have several fiction works under your belt, this class will have something for you. Come and share in this interesting format. The extended time slot will allow our co-teachers to cover more ground and will provide you with an opportunity to ask questions. The welcome mat will be out and the light will be on, so feel free to come and go as needed if you have appointments with editors during part of this workshop. You’ll be able to follow along with the provided materials.


Bios:

Virginia Smith left her job as a corporate director to become a full time writer and speaker in the summer of 2005. Since then she has received contracts for six novels and published numerous articles and short stories. She writes contemporary humorous novels for the Christian market, including her debut, Just As I Am (Kregel Publications, March 2006) and the upcoming Murder by Mushroom (Steeple Hill, August 2007). Her short fiction has been anthologized, and her articles have been published in a variety of Christian magazines, including Today’s Christian, Women Alive!, Evangel, Standard, and Cross & Quill. Smith is the critique group moderator for the Christian Writers Fellowship International, and serves on the board of directors of the Christian Authors Network. An energetic speaker, she loves to compare real-life situations to well-known works of fiction, such as her popular talk, “Biblical Truths in Star Trek.” www.VirginiaSmith.org

Kathy Carlton Willis has always enjoyed fiddling with words. She is an inspirational and motivational speaker, literary publicist for Glass Road Public Relations, copy editor and content writer. GRPR helps novelists with line edits, content edits, book proposals, finding the right agent, creating media campaigns for book PR, blog tours, as well as a speakers bureau. A variety of her columns and book reviews appear online and in print publications. She is somewhat of a grammar guru, with columns for writers appearing in three publications, including ByLine Magazine. She served for some time as a copyeditor and writer for The Sunday Challenger. Kathy’s favorite ministry is mentoring other writers. She has owned 10 online critique groups and currently serves as a writer’s coach for an online mentoring clinic to help writers achieve their dreams. Her volunteer time with the Fellowship of Christian Writers and The Writers View allows her to pay back to the writing community for all they’ve done for her.

I'll also be offering a Manuscript Critiques service for the conference. Contact me for more details.

Things Are Looking Up!

This morning my cell phone rang about 9:30 a.m. or so, and I said, "I bet this is about the house!" Sure enough, it was the bank saying we had received conditional approval on the mortgage from underwriting. They just needed some paperwork from various sources that were all pretty quick fixes.

Then, 10 minutes later, the phone rang again. This time, it was a SBC church in the area requesting Russ's services to be an interim music director. He went tonight to lead music and then after church they were going to meet with him for an interview. If he gets this, then his new career as "The Staff Guy" has begun! How exciting!

At lunchtime we stopped by our Realtor to tell her the good news about the loan. Of course, she was on top of things and already knew about it. In fact, she was responsible for helping get some of the paperwork to the appropriate places today to move things along. While we were in the office, she called to find out just how close we are to closing. Well...we are close enough to having all the paperwork together that the bank said we could set a closing time for Friday!

Thinking of everything, our Realtor set up two times on Friday. We will either close on the house at 10:00 a.m. or, if some documents are delayed due to waiting on overnight mail, we will close at 2:00 p.m. Either way, it's looking like we are closing on Friday. YAY!

Now we have to get to work arranging for all of our utilities to be hooked up and turned on-hopefully before the weekend so we can move in.

We are going to be sooooo excited once this thing really happens. I'm still too numb to believe it's really happening!

Also today we arranged for a P.O. Box for Russ's business, and his cell phone, so that he is ready to go with his new ministry. It's all falling into place.

More news as it breaks!